The brother whose death collapsed the whole family is “not there.” The father who disappeared is never mentioned by name. The resentment, anger, disappointment, and hurt feelings boiling just beneath the surface are masked with pleasantries and passivity. The unjust losses suffered and advantages gained are barely acknowledged. The gathering family distract themselves with the buzz of inebriants and electronic devices.
Underneath this veneer of civility and acceptable behavior, emotions ignite in the heart and pound against closed throats and anxious bellies of those sensitive to what is unseen and unspoken. In reality, when it comes to parents and children, brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, wives and husbands, the more accurate acronym is WINAIWYG – What Is Not Acknowledged Is What You Get.
In actuality, there is more to us than our unique human body, personal history and differentiated mind. Yes, we are our individual selves, but we are also the sum of experiences and memories that comprise our collective familial lineage. Our parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents, and the countless ancestors behind them literally live on our minds, bodies, and the consciousness surrounding us. When the family gets together, guess who’s there? Everyone! Literally.
Imagine what it would be like if instead of having to repeat old family patterns and arguments, you could free yourself and your children from having to be the baggage holders for your elders’ undigested sorrow.
Imagine sitting at the holiday table and feeling a depth of connection to the strength, love, and grace of a loved one who came before you. During this time of the year in New England, the roots of the plants are drawing down the sugars to store and it may be time for us as well to cultivate sweetness and reconnect to what is at the core of our beings.
Emily and Dan are teaching people everywhere how to access the consciousness of ancestral and divine presence that surrounds and inhabits us. According to the experts who preach WYSIWYG, it doesn’t exist. But anyone can tune into it. When given a place at the table, these presences become a resource for unknotting generations of pain, conflict, and grief.